Dissolution of Dreaming

by sleepwalkwaking

there is a physical feeling
that wells up inside me,
begins to bubble
toward the surface.
It is exciting, yet terrifying.

Then some sub-surface part of myself
quickly intervenes,
closes all the valves,
slams shut the doors and windows,
pulls the shades tight,
and says to me,
just ignore that.
nothing happened.
nothing to see here.
go about your business.
wipe that from your consciousness.

I am left with only a memory
that something was bubbling up,
some feeling was there.

Then there is a great sadness
and disappointment
that it never came to fruition,
never had a chance
to be fully expressed.

Somehow I recognize the feeling,
as the feeling of dissolution,
dissolution of dreaming.